How am I supposed to do sick Motorcycle Jumps while I’m too busy fightin wizards and gettin drunk as fuck on mead.

Well Hennessy does what he always does. Pull out my shotgun or just offer him a nice pack of Jack Links and Jack Daniels. That boy will have so much southern hospitality he won’t know what to do. Then he’ll be my friend. Years later when his wife and him take me and my old lady on a date and I kill him. Then when his wife asks why? “He shoulda never fucked with Hennessy Williams baby.” Then I fly away on my Bald Eagle shooting my many guns.

Hennessy Williams ain’t made out of money. At most I’m a Splenda Daddy with a drinking problem.

Ay man moonshine is my specialty. If it ain’t 100 proof I won’t drink it. I will literally fight you for that record.

Hey, I know Hennessy Williams Stunt Man Extraordinaire can’t be the only one who watches pro wrestling. Let me see all you pretty sumabitches.

Mix between Lil Coidone, Joe Dirt and Ash from Supernatural. Hennessy is the redneck Macgyver.

If Hennessy ain’t at least top 7 I’ll be sadder than hell.

Big man beat the shit out of 5 guys and then an OUWAAAAA man eliminated big guy. Everyone was mad.

Greatly appreciated hombre.

Look at my dick! I talk to myself all the time, I don’t need some nerd to tell me that nobody is listening. If I wanted an opinion I’d talk to my old lady.

Oh shit y’all. It’s the damn Elimination Chamber in under an hour. If y’all know me you know I love beer and wrestling so this is like the Pro Bowl before the Super Bowl for me. I’m about to cream my mufuckin britches.

Autocorrect tries to help me. But most of the times it ruins everything.

I grow all sorts of things..

It promotes death. It sells for thousands of dollars and people kill each other for it. It grows here and if you even step near it they’ll threaten to shoot you

Ever heard of Ginseng?